Four Guild Wars 2 Characters and How to Make Their Favorite Drinks

Thanks so much to Mel, who chose and paired each of these drinks with their characters. That’s where his involvement with this article stopped, though. The rest is all me, and I’m saying this because blaming the disastrous #4 or the lazy #3 on anyone but myself would be cruel.

Ranked by how well these turned out, here are some alcoholic drinks that I attempted to replicate from the game.

 

  1. Caithe’s Bloodstone Orange Summer Ale

This one, while planning, seemed like it might turn out the best of the four, but I was wrong. Maybe you’ll know better than me why that is when I admit it was made up of:

Grapefruit pulp

Pale ale

The amount of each is at your discretion, but it will turn out bad no matter what. You can call this a cop-out, but I did avoid Blue Moon and oranges, knowing that that would turn out great however I tried to spin it. I used a grapefruit because of the “Blood…Orange” part of the name. I know that Bloodstone is a completely different thing in Guild Wars, but there is no real-life equivalent. I was thinking of using red Kool-Aid mix or something, just as a symbol, if anything, but that…would have been embarrassing because if we were asked to pick something in real life that’s the same as Bloodstone or Bloodstone Dust, whoever picks Kool-Aid is probably drinking the Kool-Aid.

So I worked with what was there. Now, the in-game description of the drink states that the citrus within the ale comes from multiple sources, so I bought a lemon, maybe to have a cute, summer-like wedge placed on the edge of the glass.

First went the pulp:

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And then pouring the beer on top:

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A taste, and then…no. No lemon. Nix the lemon, goodbye lemon. That drink did not need to be more sour. Maybe you like sour beers, but though it wasn’t strong, it definitely wasn’t subtle. That glass sat on the counter for a while, and ten minutes later, the drink started sizzling, and it was audible from across the room. It was as if the acid and base were fighting it out and one of them finally won. I should have tasted it after that. It could have tasted a little better…or far worse.

 

 

  1. Zojja’s Experimental Ooze Booze

I wasn’t too excited about this, but I then remembered what Ooze generally looks like in the game: Jell-O. Then I was in. Predictably, I made a big ol’ Jell-O shot. The thumbnail for Experimental Ooze Booze looks like a purple liquid being poured into a blue substance.

My initial idea was to make blueberry Jell-O and only let it partly set in the jar, and then make grape Jell-O (with vodka already mixed with one or both of those) and pour it into the jar on top of the blue in an attempt to recreate that picture.

Here’s what happened:

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Confused? I’ll explain. I did not use grape Jell-O, or even grape juice (though that might have made a better picture), because I was afraid that the bitter flavor wouldn’t go well with the vodka. And after looking it up, it seems that vodka and grape-flavored things mixed together is more of an acquired taste. That explains the very dark, almost indiscernible purple on top. I just added a few drops of red food coloring to part of the blue mix.

As for the lack of mixing? The mix settled much faster than I thought it would. Simple as that.

On to the recipe. Zojja is highly studious, and being an asura, we’re to assume based on fantasy tropes and inferences from her size that she’s a lightweight. Here is the basic recipe:

One box of blue Jell-O mix

3 oz vodka

Red food coloring

Now, 3 ounces is the minimum. With that amount, you don’t really taste the alcohol at all, but you definitely feel it, just a pinch, while you’re chowing down. Feel free to put in more, but make sure to compensate by adding less water than the box dictates. I don’t recommend more than 6 ounces.

 

 

  1. Rytlock’s Gladiator Swill

This one was a doozy. “Swill” could refer to a few things, but I decided that it was going to mean that grainy, bitter bottom that accumulates at the bottom of a barrel at some late point in the beer brewing process. Having limited access to a brewery, I instead bought an oat ale from an independent company, drank the top three-quarters of the bottle, and let the rest sit in the fridge. Strangely enough, it was more bitter at the bottom. Possibly my imagination.

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The thumbnail that the game uses for Gladiator Swill is exactly the same as the one for Blood Whiskey. And we already know that I have red food coloring, so there you go. However, even though you may be thinking that I don’t know what I’m doing when it comes to alcohol (I don’t), I know that I can’t just take a beer that someone else made, dye it red, and call it something new. I had to add something, maybe something applicable to the picture, and its name.

The recipe:

5 oz ale “swill”

Red food coloring

1 oz whiskey

One ounce doesn’t seem like much, but it’s such a small cup. It’s not bad, but you won’t want more than that small cup.

Also, the drink shares the thumbnail with Blood Whiskey, so there’s got to be something there and still have the drink be beer-based. I used a pale ale so the red would come out more, but it’s up to you. The general feel of this drink is that it’s something that a hardened charr like Rytlock could knock back right before going out to mess some stuff up.

 

 

  1. Rox’s Stonehealer Stout

The in-game description calls for a dark stout with these flavors: roasted coffee, licorice, and molasses. No bitterness, but not overly sweet.

Here is the recipe:

1 cup weak coffee, freshly brewed

½ bottle of dark stout

2 teaspoons sugar

Black licorice (amount based on preference)

½ tablespoon molasses

First, I made what I call a “coffee mixture.” I brewed a medium- to low-strength coffee, poured it into a small pot, and set it to the side on low heat. Then I got out a cutting board and the bears:

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Those are black licorice bears coated in sugar. I chose them because they were cute, and because I knew I would find a morbidly innocent pleasure in cutting them up. I don’t like the taste of black licorice, so I only cut up four, knowing that that would be the most I’d need.

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I turned the stove up and waited for the coffee to start simmering. Then I started stirring in molasses, a very small amount at a time, tasting in between. It didn’t take much for the taste to come out. And then there were the cut-up licorice bears. It only took one bear to get a hint of black licorice, which was all I wanted. However, you can add more.

In order for the drink to still be considered a stout, I assumed that at least half of it had to be the actual beer.

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The coffee mixture was added by the time I took this picture:

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It looks almost identical, right? It took very little of the mixture to get the flavor to come out through the beer, about 2 or 3 ounces. Still bitter, and the molasses and coffee flavor was actually pretty nice.

 

So here they are! Characters and their drinks. This was definitely a lot of fun to do, but I’m clearly not an expert. In my opinion, Zojja’s drink is the best for a treat while relaxing with some PvE, and Rytlock’s drink is perhaps good to knock back while waiting in the PvP queue. It’s all about loving the game here at Guild Wars Players, so don’t let it distract you too much, merely let these drinks enhance your experience.

2 comments

  1. I don’t usually drink because I hate the taste of alcohol, but these look great. You did a fantastic job at bringing these drinks to life.

    • Alicia J /

      Thank you 🙂 I’ll admit that the biggest obstacle was money; perhaps I’ll come back to making drinks when I’m not on a college budget. I would love to be able to make them more elaborate.

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